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Subject: Guru Jr. Acceptance Speech Posted by: blue hen, Guru Jr. - Leader [34937217] Fri, Jul 20, 12:45 First of all, I want to thank the academy, and most importantly the electorate. Without your votes, I don't think I could have won. I mean, there's a little bit of a luck factor involved, but I'm pretty sure I needed the most votes to win. I'd also like to thank my support team, Twarpy, Blankenship, and KSoze, as well as all the others who offered their support. I'd like to think of this as a victory for the "little guy" and I want to inspire underdogs everywhere. If you've ever been rejected by a really hot girl, gotten a bad grade on a test, or finished with a really low ranking in Smallworld, rest easy in the hope that you too can become a Guru Jr. someday. Just don't work too hard, and most importantly, don't take yourself or anyone else too seriously. I would especially like to thank the Gurupie Chatroom, including the aforementioned three as well as JKaye, Chris_Ho_Park, Beastiemiked, G_Dogg, CanEHdian Pride, Alien_Iverson, Mach, Toral, LTA, KM, Paul Hardin, Fosten, RSF, Dev, CDNDan, and Basebot. And I'd also like to thank the Guru, although I already did so (note the "leader" next to my name). I promise to wear the Guru Jr. crown with the same reckless abandon with which I earned it. You better not post like a dumbass, because I promise that you will be ripped apart. And don't say you haven't been warned. -------------- Now, we all know that my detractors deserve absolutely nothing, and that's what they'll get. However, when a perfectly reasonable guy like J decides I am not good enough for something, I feel a need to clarify some things. Sure, I may be crass, I may be obnoxious, and I may be flat out mean. But, I do have one very important thing in common with our esteemed Guru, Dave Hall. I too, have a sports web site, and just like RotoGuru.com, all of you visit my website on a daily basis. In fact, I bet many of you have my web site as your home page. I usually don't post such personal stuff in such a private forum. However, the need has arisen. Please don't use this information against me in any blah blah blah (not sure how you could, but I wanted a disclaimer). I am the Baseball Producer for ESPN.com. That's my job. It's not a metaphor or even a blurred description. My title is Baseball Producer. Now, many of you complained that I don't post any standings around here. Well, that's not because of inherent laziness; it's actually because I am running around ensuring that the ESPN scoreboard, ESPN standings, ESPN statistics, and ESPN schedule pages are working, in addition to about a zillion other pages. While you may claim that the standings are very valuable to our Rotoguru community, I challenge you to say that you use the standings more than you use the features at ESPN.com. In fact, I bet half of you currently have ESPN open in another browser RIGHT NOW. So there you have it. In addition to humor, I have definitely used my Guru-like tendencies to help each of you. In fact, many will claim I got the job with skills I honed in the Rotoguru community. We all know that's not true - I got the job with my charm and good looks. So before you go trying to score a touchdown on me, remember that there are no penalties for late hits in Rotoguru.com... the only excessive celebration will be my own... ------------------------- Thanks again, and have a good week. | ||||||
| 65 | Lutefisker ID: 27615149 Sat, Jul 21, 14:08 |
I think that we must also address the obvious prejudice against those who choose to eat lutefisk!!! Keep lutefisk a choice!!! | |||||
| 66 | Lutefisker ID: 27615149 Sat, Jul 21, 14:18 |
I think that we all have a certain amount of latent prejudice... For instance... I didn't think that I had anything against homosexuals until I realized that I did not want my daughter to male any homosexual men... ;) | |||||
| 67 | Lutefisker ID: 206462114 Sat, Jul 21, 14:51 | err... that should be marry... not male. | |||||
| 68 | Pilewort Donor ID: 25657715 Sat, Jul 21, 16:42 | What do you get when you cross lutefisk with a gay male? Lewdefisk? Luteviscous? Capitol hill and Ballard? Peter Gammons on Ecstacy? Inquring minds want to know! | |||||
| 69 | Lutefisker ID: 206462114 Sat, Jul 21, 18:44 | Oh oh... things are getting a little Lutephobic around here... ;) | |||||
| 70 | blue hen Leader ID: 27048221 Sat, Jul 21, 18:47 |
Several of you make me sick. You give maximum credit to azdbacker for posting "timely updates" and to J and allhair for posting Gurupie standings, and to StlCards for posting a simple "what are the top 10 signs you know you're a Gurupie". With the exception of StlCards, all of the above have one thing in common: they live and breathe fantasy sports. And good for them. Well guess what? In addition to working all day ensuring that your precious ESPN scoreboard is functioning properly, I come home and log on. Occasionally, I even contribute factual information, as Pilewort noted below. Then I log onto the chatroom to see if I should trade Alex Ochoa for Mark McLemore. Heck, I even wrote a bot for IRC that asked baseball trivia questions. When I was in college, I posted on these boards about how my team had done the previous night. Since this was before the advent of "Todays Action" threads, this was essentially where people could find observations about the previous night's action and, of course, my score. Now that I'm in the real world, I don't have time for that kind of in-depth analysis. I still try, however, to offer whatever I can. It usually takes place in the chatroom, because I enjoy being around those people more that the rest of you, and also because if I'm wrong, there's less evidence. If you regularly visit Rotoguru.com, and have even the slightest objection to my selection as Guru Jr, there's a simple answer: YOU ARE WRONG. | |||||
| 71 | Lutefisker ID: 206462114 Sat, Jul 21, 18:54 |
3 Cheers for Blue Hen!!!!! | |||||
| 72 | curly ID: 8641912 Sat, Jul 21, 19:00 | my 2.000001 cents. espn or not (i use sportsline)----borng twit. | |||||
| 73 | Liberace Rules ID: 21692011 Sat, Jul 21, 19:01 |
Uh oh, the drag queen is now starting to throw a biatch tantrem! Hey "Mr" blue hen, is it that time for the month for you? Just take some Midol, relax, and stop taking things so seriously. | |||||
| 74 | blue hen Leader ID: 27048221 Sat, Jul 21, 20:10 |
Let me see if have this correct, Seattle Slew. You are using the nickname "Liberace Rules" and you are making fun of me? Just checking. Maybe you're Seattle Slew's roommate. That would explain a lot. Are you jealous? And curly... why don't you use ESPN? | |||||
| 75 | curly ID: 8641912 Sat, Jul 21, 20:34 |
hen, I use cbs cause my pa (billy hill) likes it and it fits on the webtv tv better. we don't have no chat room to get who to pick up stuff from so we just use here for ideas. You never liked me anyway,even at school. yea i raise chickens,so what,they ain't blue they white perdues. | |||||
| 76 | Liberace Rules ID: 21692011 Sat, Jul 21, 20:58 |
Q - Before ESPN.com, blue hen worked for a sperm bank. Why was he fired? A - He got caught drinking on the job. Q - How do you know if your in blue hen's church? A - Only half the congregation is kneeling. | |||||
| 77 | Lutefisker ID: 206462114 Sat, Jul 21, 21:08 |
Liberace Rules... Your humor stinks worse than lutefisk. | |||||
| 79 | Liberace Rules ID: 21692011 Sat, Jul 21, 21:24 |
Q - If blue hen was a dinosaur, which one would he be? A - Megasoreass | |||||
| 80 | Baldwin ID: 4261155 Sat, Jul 21, 21:30 | Just when you think this thread can't get any weirder... | |||||
| 81 | alias ID: 526492121 Sat, Jul 21, 22:10 |
I love it when people post under an alias. It makes their dergoatory comments all the more salient, and they even think they retain whatever illusion of credibility on the board they had afterwards. Now that no one knows who I am, maybe I can start throwing around flames and racial slurs because I wrongly think no one knows who I am. Sometimes the immaturity and disrespect of some of the bigots on this board makes me sick. | |||||
| 82 | Peregrine ID: 526492121 Sat, Jul 21, 22:12 | BTW, congrats blue hen. Anyone who was fairly elected should not take nearly as much crap as you have for a popularly elected award. | |||||
| 83 | KTxGOD ID: 463661 Sun, Jul 22, 01:44 |
Nice Job Blue Hen =) ~ (did i just say that) Sorry i did not vote, i did not intend to do that, i was trying to be like many other american citizens. Actually, i just competely forgot to cuz you were giving such great insight in the chatroom and that i couldnt switch over to the boards... Glad u didnt lose by a vote =) cuz u woulda had mine | |||||
| 84 | Tim G ID: 24454220 Sun, Jul 22, 03:03 | My fondest blue hen memories are his "How did blue hen do tonight" posts on the hockey forum, which annoyed the hell out of people at first. Then there was the picture he posted where he almost dunked a basketball on an 8 foot rim in the driveway of his parents house. The fact that I remember this much about him maks him worthy of Guru Jr. I wish I had voted for him. | |||||
| 85 | blue hen Leader ID: 27048221 Sun, Jul 22, 05:20 |
Tim G, thanks for that. However, it was a 10 foot basket, and I didn't "almost" dunk, I actually did dunk. Seattle Slew: Those jokes are neither funny nor terribly offensive towards me. I expected better. Seriously, where in Seattle do you live. I'd like to take you out for a Zima. KTxGod, you're still not getting ops in the chatroom. Thanks for your support though. alias, you could not be more correct. I hate when people post under names other than their own. | |||||
| 86 | Dev ID: 20147416 Sun, Jul 22, 19:09 |
How is blue hen a "Megasoreass" if he won? He isn't the one whining and crying. Looks like some people are taking this a little to seriously. | |||||
| 87 | Dev ID: 20147416 Sun, Jul 22, 19:10 | ...too seriously. | |||||
| 88 | Jose Lima ID: 39252299 Sun, Jul 22, 19:49 | It's Lima Time!! | |||||
| 89 | Twarpy Leader ID: 115471115 Sun, Jul 22, 20:20 | Blue Hen as anyone can see when you "dunk" the ball you have really jumped from the fence towards the net. White men can't jump bud;) | |||||
| 90 | azdbacker in WI ID: 0644238 Mon, Jul 23, 08:57 | Congrats, blue hen. | |||||
| 92 | Lutefisker ID: 206462114 Mon, Jul 23, 10:08 |
I think that all the people who are whining about Blue Hen as Guru Jr. should check out the politics board and get in touch with those Gore supporters who are also still whining about the election... Live with it... | |||||
| 94 | ksoze Donor ID: 50643419 Mon, Jul 23, 10:19 |
Dude, Firstbaseman@work, Hershey's Heros, Don Perignon (by the way, it's "Dom") if you want to voice your opinion try picking a name and sticking with it rather then hiding behind one of 4 or 5 monikers like a scared little child. Very original. Bluhen did not choose himself for Guru Jr, we did. Lastly, see post 5. | |||||
| 96 | Blue Hen Bad Choice ID: 56535410 Mon, Jul 23, 10:43 | I guess there is one thing that he does contribute and that is money. If that is all it takes to be Guru Jr......... | |||||
| 98 | Blue Hen Bad Choice ID: 56535410 Mon, Jul 23, 10:51 |
By the way, my name is Don (called Dannyboy by friends for some reason) and that is why I had the nick Don Perignon and not Dom. Secondly, I share this computer at my office with First Baseman who took care of my team and so I nominated him. I know he did the same for IRA and one other person I think. First Baseman's team is Hershy Hero. Just because i know a guy, does not mean I can't vote for him | |||||
| 99 | aiko aiko ID: 1439109 Mon, Jul 23, 10:55 |
 the more things change....nice to see you're still keeping everyone on their toes. congrats. perhaps you should bring back blue hen jr. and cause some real controversy. | |||||
| 100 | Species Donor ID: 304521510 Mon, Jul 23, 10:58 |
a-squared in the house! Where've you been? Very nice animation. blue hen only wishes he was sculpted like that..... | |||||
| 101 | aiko aiko ID: 1439109 Mon, Jul 23, 11:04 |
long story short, started my own business and i'm rarely in front of a computer now. i miss the good old days of getting paid to play smallworld and hang out here! | |||||
| 102 | Pilewort Donor ID: 25657715 Mon, Jul 23, 11:27 |
With just a tiny bit more negative kharma, they (mariners) will be limping into the postseason, and there promptly die an ignoble and ghastly first-round death, with attendant weeping and wailing and cries of "what went wrong". ...F Gump ------------------ Hey F Gump Worse-ly, you seem to have enacted some type of reverse jinx on the Mariners. When you wrote the above, they were in fact 17-15 over the prior 30 games (a woeful .530 winning percentage--a real tailspin). However, since you penned those prothetic (pathetic?) words, they've extended their overall lead on ALL of MLB to 13 games and increased their record to 44 games over .500. A MLB manager (Casey?) once said, "You're going to lose a third of your games and you're going to win a third of your games. It's what you do with the remaining third of your games that determins your success." Using that .666 statement as a yardstick, the M's are 17 games better than perfect. | |||||
| 103 | here ID: 45631812 Mon, Jul 23, 11:29 |
"They were in fact 17-15 over the prior 30 games" Great math. Last time I check 17 and 15 was 32. | |||||
| 104 | Pilewort Donor ID: 25657715 Mon, Jul 23, 11:35 | yes, they M's are so good, they can even win more games than they play! | |||||
| 105 | Ender ID: 13443221 Mon, Jul 23, 11:52 | 17 is not more than 32 ;) | |||||
| 106 | Slow Stick Sustainer ID: 586252312 Mon, Jul 23, 13:39 |
I said this in post 20 and I will say this again. (with minor edits) Wow, I did not think this award would be so controversial. ... Blue Hen has shown Guru tendencies many times by piping in on a thread that has stopped being about the facts and opinions but about the participant's heritage or worse. He post just the right sarcasm to realign the thread to a relevant topic, cool the personal attacks, and bring knowledge back into the arguments. We should Join him by trying to keep this site on subject and not on an individual's personalities, heritage, race or smell. But on the facts or opinions supporting a particular post. That leadership is why I will support him as RotoGuru Jr. may his reign be short and sweet. | |||||
| 107 | blue hen, Guru Jr. Leader ID: 34937217 Mon, Jul 23, 15:02 | That sounds familiar. Where have I heard that before? | |||||
| 108 | First Baseman ID: 31635315 Mon, Jul 23, 16:58 |
Hi all. I was reading the boards from home and noticed my name dragged into the conversation about Blue Hen. I personally could care less who is Guru Jr. every two weeks. I think it should be a monthly change instead of Bi-Weekly to make it a bit more 'special'. I will say that I am the owner of Hershy's Heroes and have helped several people. I use the nickname Hershy (Hershy's Heroes) and First Baseman (The position I used to play). I am somewhat confused by what has been going on here as posts are obviously missing/deleted (91,93,95,97) around where my name has been talked about but be assured it was not me involved in whatever has been going on. I did not even know someone voted for me. Normally, I wouldn't even respond to this garbage but since I enjoy playing Hockey and Baseball in Smallworld and use these threads daily, I figured I should clear my name. Unfortuantely I can do nothing about my co-worker (Maybe I'll screw around with Don's files. Watch out Donny. lol) | |||||
| 109 | Cleveland Fan Donor ID: 294172211 Tue, Jul 24, 14:38 |
Congrats Blue Hen. We were anxiously waiting for your opinion on Colon's suspension for NOT hitting Servais in another thread? | |||||
| 110 | Mariners2001 ID: 166172413 Tue, Jul 24, 14:52 | The only "servais" blue hen would like to provide is "colon" inspections for men. | |||||
| 111 | blue hen, Guru Jr. Leader ID: 34937217 Tue, Jul 24, 16:39 |
Are you volunteering? I'm sure you're local to my "offices". Or did I mean "orifices"? As for Colon - sure he meant to hit him. He is a vile human being and should be dealt with harshly. Especially since Servais isn't a prima donna like Mike Piazza. | |||||
| 113 | Ira ID: 53656510 Fri, Aug 17, 12:49 | dude, u've been Guru Jr for like a month...is that right? | |||||
| 114 | Ira ID: 53656510 Fri, Aug 17, 12:50 | oops, didnt see azd | |||||
| 115 | blue hen, almighty Leader ID: 34937217 Fri, Aug 17, 13:20 | Moron. But then, we already knew that. | |||||
| 116 | blue hen, almighty Leader ID: 27048221 Fri, Mar 01, 2002, 02:10 |
It's my blue hen given right to BUTT this thread. | |||||
| 117 | Catfish Sustainer ID: 9657107 Fri, Mar 01, 2002, 13:16 | * Sigh * | |||||
| 118 | Fosten ID: 578432719 Tue, Mar 05, 2002, 19:37 | Thanks for the nod bh. :) | |||||
| 119 | Micheal ID: 567421419 Wed, Mar 06, 2002, 01:51 | Reliving your finest gurupie moment blue hen? Who cares? It was 8 months ago. Step into the present. | |||||
| 120 | blue hen, almighty Leader ID: 34937217 Wed, Mar 06, 2002, 09:31 | Speaking of presence, I wish you would remove yours... | |||||
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