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Subject: Thank You to the Guru & All of You
Posted by: Chuck
- [336491410] Sun, Jul 14, 2013, 11:56
I know I haven't posted around here much in many years, but I felt the need to say thank you to a group of people I never met, but still somehow represent a large chunk of my life. I need to tell my story, and I hope it will help someone and be therapeutic to me as well-- as a very sentimental person.
As a child, I loved the game of baseball. It was my passion. I grew up in New Jersey in the 80's and became a ravenous Mets fan. (Little did I know that 86 was as good as it would ever get!). I still remember the guy parachuting in during game 6 of the 1986 World Series-- I was just 5. I was allowed to stay up that night and got to witness the ball go through Buckner's legs. That sealed my love for baseball.
That next year, my love for baseball expanded into baseball cards. My parents could tell you stories of my floor and bed being covered wall-to-wall with stacks and piles. It started with my dad circling the home run total on the back of 87 Topps cards, as I had a growing love for Math and statistics. Slowly, I tried to usurp the neighborhood baseball card king, Derrick, but I was never close.
I played little league and donned the tools of ignorance like my grandfather. It guaranteed me playing time because I sure couldn't hit. I didn't realize "keep your eye on the ball" meant to watch it and wasn't just a generic baseball saying! I played until the game became to fast and I became too awkward. My dreams of going pro died at the age of 12 or so. Honestly, there is a part of me that still hates that.
We didn't have much growing up as a pastor's family, but we didn't know it. The church provided our house, the car always ran and God was always good. My parents loved us and life was good.
As life happens, I grew. I loved baseball, even though my Mets never provided again what defined my childhood in 1986. Finding fantasy sports rekindled my love for the game. Through CNN/SI, I found a link to someone who mentioned the site and doing real statistics. I loved every minute of it. I joined in the old forums and relish the days of steve houpt's statistical analysis and Pink Pimp's week in reviews (forgive me if names are off-- it's been awhile!). I lost on the guess the winner so many times from forgetting to set picks. I remember Randro and the need to be on right when prices changed. I played so many other games on here, even playing fantasy basketball solely on stats, never watching a game. My favorite fantasy game to play-- and the only one I still play-- is Market Madness and I still proudly wear (well, as a paint shirt) my booby prize shirt. I never achieved a coveted birth in the Guru Hall of Fame, but I think I'm at least even on fantasy expenses over the years because of one good Rotohog football season. Did I mention, I have Rotoguru and Rotohog shirts galore. I played in Dirty Dozen and Lucky 13 and I think I won a hat from one of those one year. I am a Gurupatron.
I have caught (err... picked up) a foul ball at Wrigley Field. I got to go to "Game 163" Twins/Tigers in 2009-- the greatest game I have ever seen. I have been on the jumbotron more times than I can count.
I experienced and followed 9/11 here. I got poker advice here (probably lost more than I earned and have a horrible sharkscope rating). I still peruse the entertainment forum to follow Survivor threads. This forum was life (probably too extreme for awhile!) for many years.
Life has continued to roll on.
My mom passing away 8 years ago symbolized the official end of my childhood when I was 24. My dad almost died of a heart attack a year later. We're still working to pull together as a family, but we're not the same, and it hurts.
I discovered my beautiful bride 3 years ago through online dating, just the next town over. She'll never meet my mom on this side of eternity, and though there is hope in Jesus for us, it still stinks. We had a wedding ceremony that was amazing simple and beautiful. It was not what we would have wanted, but we did what we could afford. I pray I have the opportunity to give her the ceremony one day she deserves.
I write this today, with our next child on the way. Our due date is today and she's resting until her body says it's time. We know nothing about this child-- we have boy and girl names picked out. We have joys and dreams for this child, but am feeling incapable of being a father.
The church I served at for 11 years made it clear we were no longer wanted. I have turned to eBay to keep my family going. I know my wife doesn't like it, but she loves me and is trusting me, and it feels like things don't sell fast enough to meet the bills. I don't know how it can work, except by God's grace. I've come face to face with having to sell off much of my stuff (combined with my attempts at picking garage sales and Target clearances) to pay the bills. It is both difficult and freeing to sell of final bits of baseball cards and autographs. I feel weak and strong. And I feel even less capable of being a good father, knowing my own failings. To simplify: I am completely scared to a level I feel few understand. I'm secretly hoping it's a boy so I can start exploring the world of sports again with someone who has childlike awe. I need some of that for me right now. Rest assured, if I have children who get into fantasy sports, I will direct them here.
We have a fresh start and a move to Florida on the horizon and we're trusting God to provide as he already has in amazing ways. But I am scared.
But I am so grateful for great memories from here and I wanted to say thank you to a forgotten group for all the support and memories over the years. You deserve to know you had a great life impact on me as a site and group of friends. Thank you. I am so grateful. |
| 1 | holt
ID: 28545223
Mon, Jul 15, 2013, 00:46
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Thanks for sharing, Chuck. My dad is a preacher (for almost 50 years now). Being a PK was difficult. We moved about every 3 years or so. He has always been a hard worker and a great minister to his congregations. Sadly, there are usually powerful church members whose prime interest is the church bank balance. I became pretty jaded over that, but my dad has always kept going. Thankfully, he was called to a church in his home town about 15 years ago and he is still there. Every time a door closed, another one opened. He has always had faith in that. He hasn't had to work a day in a "secular" job since the day he began his first pastorate.
Anyway, just saying I know where you are coming from. Best of luck to you. It will work out.
My experience with baseball is similar to yours. I played little league, then got back into baseball through APBA baseball (a sim game somewhat like stratomatic). I also played baseball in high school but wasn't highly skilled. Turns out I'm better at deciphering statistics than I am at hitting line drives and fielding grounders.
Doesn't matter. I love fantasy baseball and my dad and I are both Cardinals fans. We've made the drive from Oklahoma to see them a few times, and I go over and watch games on tv with him when I can. That reminds me, whenever he was led to a new town (Oklahoma, Iowa, Kansas), there was always a radio station that carried all the Cardinals games! That helped.
Again, thanks for sharing, best of luck to you, and congrats on your soon-to-be fatherhood.
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| 2 | Khahan
ID: 39432178
Mon, Jul 15, 2013, 09:09
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Thanks Chuck. The sentiment that an online community can mean so much to people is shared by more than you'd guess. I've been coming to these boards since around 2000 or 2001. That's 12 years I've been around many of you guys.
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| 3 | GO
ID: 9649157
Mon, Jul 15, 2013, 09:24
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Good luck Chuck - and lets hear those baby details when the time comes... an All Star baby?!
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| 4 | KrazyKoalaBears
ID: 436381511
Mon, Jul 15, 2013, 12:38
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"And I feel even less capable of being a good father, knowing my own failings."
I've only been a father for just over 11 months now, but if there's anything I've figured out it's that nobody has it figured out. I know it sounds cliche, but it's true.
Don't let your past determine your future with this. Take the lead from God and give unconditional love to your son/daughter and you'll be the best father you can be.
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| 5 | Chuck
ID: 336491410
Mon, Jul 15, 2013, 19:00
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Thanks all so much for the words and encouragement. It's what I always found here in the past which is what made it so special. Rest assured, I'll bring you an update when our newbie joins us!
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| 6 | Chuck
ID: 336491410
Tue, Jul 30, 2013, 10:04
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Our girl Selah Gianna was born a couple weeks ago. I was already at the hospital for emergency appendectomy the night before, so it all worked out well, as I got to be in the delivery room all drugged up myself!
Once again, thank you for all the support over the years!
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| 7 | Perm Dude
ID: 41661813
Tue, Jul 30, 2013, 10:11
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+1 Chuck. Great news.
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| 8 | Khahan
ID: 39432178
Tue, Jul 30, 2013, 10:58
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Congratulations on the new little one Chuck!!
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| 9 | KrazyKoalaBears
ID: 436381511
Tue, Jul 30, 2013, 13:28
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Congratulations!
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| 10 | holt
Donor
ID: 308491916
Tue, Jul 30, 2013, 14:29
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Awesome Chuck! Congratulations!
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| 11 | wiggs
Leader
ID: 04991311
Tue, Jul 30, 2013, 20:56
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WTG Chuck- good luck with everything. I am expecting twins anytime and I am so excited.
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| 12 | Chuck
ID: 336491410
Sun, Aug 04, 2013, 01:41
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Thanks so much! I feel like I'm back in college pulling all nighters with our cute bundle. :)
Congrats on your upcoming twins, wiggs!
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