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Subject: Top 10 things about pitching a perfect game
Posted by: Guru
- [330592710] Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:15
This is from Letterman's show a couple nights ago. Some are hilarious.
Late Show Top Ten Cool Things About Pitching A Perfect Game
10. "After this, I can go 0-15 for the year and honestly not give a crap"
9. "My pre-game dinner at Denny's tonight? On the house!"
8. "Shows everyone that even though I'm 40, I can still...I'm sorry, I lost my train of thought"
7. "Cool to get congratulatory call from the President, even though he kept calling me "Larry"
6. "Can walk up to guys who've thrown no-hitters and whisper, "Loser"
5. "All the pine tar I can eat!"
4. "Your catcher hugs you and it feels kinda...nice"
3. "Maybe people will finally forget about the time I killed that bird"
2. "It's just one more thing about me that's perfect, am I right, ladies?"
1. "George Steinbrenner just offered me a billion dollars to sign with the yankees"
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| 1 | Mike D
Sustainer
ID: 41831612
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:18
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ROFL! # 8 is my favorite.
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| 2 | Deadeyes
ID: 51137210
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:30
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are you seroius? #8 is not funny at all. same old old joke. it's not original.
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| 3 | Mike D
Sustainer
ID: 41831612
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:32
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Yeah, you're right, my bad, I didn't really think it was funny now that you explained that to me.
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| 4 | Deadeyes
ID: 51137210
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:34
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the joke with steinbrenner is OLD TOO and so is the president joke too. The rest are average.
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| 5 | darkside
Dude
ID: 3590317
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:36
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Does anyone know if he really eats at Denny's before a game? When I saw that I though it was ridiculous for a huge baseball star to eat at Denny's before he pitches, but figure there are probably weirder superstitions.
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| 6 | Deadeyes
ID: 51137210
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:38
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I am not sure. But the writers are seriously kind of weak. I really doubt Schilling eats at Denny's before a game. That's ridiculous. People would follow him and stuff. Never going to happen.
I could write a top 10 better than that.
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| 7 | J
Leader
ID: 49346417
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:39
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get to it then.
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| 8 | J
Leader
ID: 49346417
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:39
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#2 was really funny when he did it live on the show.
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| 9 | Deadeyes
ID: 51137210
Fri, May 21, 2004, 10:41
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that could be funny if randy johnson said that because he is pretty fugly. Yes i could do a lot better.
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| 10 | j o s h
ID: 164572017
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:04
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roflmao at all of em
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| 11 | Deadeyes
ID: 51137210
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:11
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wow americans have no sense of humor. You call that humor? i don't get it. Nothing spectacular about it.
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| 12 | Mattinglyinthehall
Leader
ID: 1629107
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:17
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Put up or shut up, Deadeyes.
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| 13 | Tree
Donor
ID: 599393013
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:34
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Deadeyes - your head is the exact thing God had in mind when someone told him he needed to design a "target for a Randy Johnson fastball..."
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| 14 | J
Leader
ID: 49346417
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:46
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too bad that bird got in the way, that one was meant for deadeyes
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| 15 | j o s h
ID: 164572017
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:46
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let me explain #'s 2-4-6 and 9 roflmo what an idiot. Now, as far as Letterman's list, I thought they were all pretty funny too esp #8. just the way he said it:)
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| 16 | PermDude
ID: 2343587
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:50
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Funny list.
Deadeyes = "message board virus"
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| 17 | Mike D
Sustainer
ID: 41831612
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:52
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(please
ignore
the
trolls)
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| 18 | blue hen
ID: 372102211
Fri, May 21, 2004, 11:52
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#6.
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| 19 | R9
Leader
ID: 2624472
Fri, May 21, 2004, 12:09
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Yeah, #6 here too. Good list. Letterman's humor is kind of hit or miss I guess, but I prefer him over Leno.
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| 20 | Matt G
ID: 24212268
Fri, May 21, 2004, 12:37
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Letterman is such dry humor, I love it...
Great List Guru, thanks for posting it as I missed that show.
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| 21 | KrazyKoalaBears
Leader
ID: 517553018
Fri, May 21, 2004, 13:10
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10, 8, 6, and 1 had me laughing the most. Even Yankees have to get a laugh out of #1. :)
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| 22 | gibby88
ID: 23811216
Fri, May 21, 2004, 13:39
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#6 is classic!
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| 23 | Ref
Donor
ID: 539581218
Fri, May 21, 2004, 13:51
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Deadeyes, did someone break that wood bat over your head or something, is that why you're looking for another one? Maybe yourwit is beyond us all, but I thought those were pretty funny. #6 was pretty funny too.
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| 24 | Tree
Donor
ID: 599393013
Fri, May 21, 2004, 13:57
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Actually, i found Deadeyes #6 to be nearly as funny as Letterman's #6, since Deadeyes clearly doesn't even have the correct pitcher mentioned.
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| 25 | Deadeyes
ID: 534482022
Fri, May 21, 2004, 17:04
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i did that on purpose and you got it. wow, i didn't know people in here had a brain. nice work fellas.
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| 26 | PermDude
ID: 2343587
Fri, May 21, 2004, 17:09
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Deadeyes = Pee Wee Herman
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| 27 | StLCards
Leader
ID: 31010716
Fri, May 21, 2004, 17:10
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I like #2. It becomes so much better since RJ himself read them.
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| 28 | Wilmer McLean
ID: 75249
Fri, May 21, 2004, 17:17
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I like #6 the best.
baseball humor page - has links to a bunch of Letterman Top Ten Lists about baseball
Top Ten - Signs the pressure is getting to you during a perfect game
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| 29 | azdbacker
ID: 424421712
Fri, May 21, 2004, 17:29
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TOP TEN
Things You Don't Want To Hear From a Fenway Park Hot Dog Vendor
7. Try my Buckner Special - one that was between my legs.
1. Remember: 1 if by salmonella, 2 if by trichinosis.
TOP TEN
Fidel Castro Baseball Jeers
7. "Years of indoor plumbing have made you Americans soft and weak."
3. "I'm not paying you $6 a year to strike out."
lmao - Thanks, Wilmer.
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| 30 | holt
ID: 5444876
Fri, May 21, 2004, 21:34
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deadeyes was considered a troll on the TSN boards last season, and that's saying something.
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| 31 | J
Leader
ID: 49346417
Fri, May 21, 2004, 21:46
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i thought he was considered PGunn last season?
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| 32 | Deadeyes
ID: 6482120
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:03
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No. I am not pgunn or whoever he is. Was he cool? What happened to him?
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| 33 | Ender
ID: 314241420
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:13
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JerryLewis was PGunn last year.
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| 34 | holt
ID: 5444876
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:18
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that's an insult to j.lewis.
jerry lewis was over-bearing but at least he had some sports knowledge and made a good point every now and then.
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| 35 | Ender
ID: 314241420
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:24
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Whatever, people accused him of being PGunn all the time. Someone even referred to him as PGunn constantly.
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| 36 | KrazyKoalaBears
Leader
ID: 517553018
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:29
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JerryLewis was PGunn. He signed up for my TSN-Style Yahoo football league last year as "JerryLewis", but his Yahoo username had PGunn in it (with some numbers and such). Surely not a coincidence.
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| 37 | Deadeyes
ID: 6482120
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:39
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supposedly i got rid of jerry lewis. Someone said i replaced him. Poor guy.
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| 38 | holt
ID: 5444876
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:41
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I meant that comparing j-lewis to deadeyes was an insult. pgunn and j-lewis are one and the same of course.
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| 39 | Deadeyes
ID: 6482120
Fri, May 21, 2004, 22:42
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oh okay good. I was confused. Jerry Lewis. No one ever liked that guy. I am sports rock star.
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| 40 | F. Deadeyes
ID: 194392122
Fri, May 21, 2004, 23:39
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Wouldn't surprise me in the least if Deadeyes were PGunn aka JerryLewis. They are both obnoxious, whiny, insecure, egotistical and always begging for attention.
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| 41 | KnicksFan
ID: 51411222
Sat, May 22, 2004, 03:28
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Jerry Lewis/PGunn was the funniest "troll" this board ever had. He could be as big a jerk as deadeyes, but at least he did it in a smart and funny way.
Top 10 reasons deadeyes can write a better top 10 list than Letterman's writers:
10. He has a AAA Guidebook.
9. He uses mapquest.com
8. He owns a world atlas.
7. He has a Rand McNally globe.
6. His car has OnStar.
5. He stayed at a Holiday Inn Express.
4. He has a compass.
3. His middle name is Magellan.
2. He saw Pirates of the Caribbean.
1. Deadeyes has a treasure map.
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| 42 | PermDude
ID: 2343587
Sat, May 22, 2004, 03:30
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KF, were you around when SuperStar was here? He was a huge troll, and then announced it was all some kind of experiment for his sociology class.
We all saw it for what it was: a bad attempt to weasel his way into the only group he actually knew.
pd
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| 43 | KnicksFan
ID: 454492521
Sat, May 22, 2004, 16:53
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I don't remember SuperStar. He must not have been around during basketball season.
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| 44 | Deadeyes
ID: 6482120
Sat, May 22, 2004, 20:35
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Let's get serious guys for a minute. I am watching "who wants to be a millionaire" and i haven't missed one answer since it's been on. Now tell me how i should apply. Although i am not too sure i can win the quick order contest at the beginning because i think things too methodically. But wait a second this is easy everyday knowledge. NEVERMIND i rock. Sign me up.
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| 45 | Mike D
Sustainer
ID: 41831612
Sat, May 22, 2004, 23:13
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I remember him PD. Just eggin' people on, in a brutal way. Then "admitted" things later. Yeah, won't forget that dude.
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